Two guys came to our door today wearing name tags. I asked them if they liked wearing name tags. To my surprise their answer was yes. Which would really bug me, being told that I had to become Elder Melanie. They said it was better than safety equipment at their last job, but somehow that didn't sell me on it. They were both really nice guys and pretty real and passionate and we had a great chat. Well mostly just Josh and them, I picked up rotten pumpkins off the porch. And I thought about wearing a backpack and the bondage it would hold me in, everyday with a backpack and name tag, everyday. Would the world know the me behind my pin?
And I got thinking about Elder Melanie. Even though I don't have a "real" little name tag. How often do I show up and go through my motions. Selling myself to what I'm selling.
Anyone following me here?
Cause if I could somehow give that up- selling myself to what I am selling and selling others to what I'm selling and finally eliminate the coat, the pin, the bag full of junk that I carry.
What- Junk? Am I not as religious as these two young men, with a heart full of fear in actually responding to God, acknowledging that I just don't have a lead part in this whole production, or how about the desire to fill this void instead with things, food, and anything tangible.
What would I find under my coat? With nothing to win, nothing to gain, nothing to lose.
Just me. Messy, yes. But me.
Who every loses his life, will find it.