Friday, March 20, 2009


it's funny, in africa i felt closer to craig than i have since he left. perhaps it was the crazy motor cycle ride on top of the couch...
my heart breaks for a friend who has lost her best friend. and parents that aren't holding their little man tonight. it makes me feel unjustified that my heart is broken.
he held me instead of my dad the evening of our wedding and i covered his shoulder with snot. there isn't a day that doesn't go by that i don't long to dance with him again.
i feel as i have lived the past months in a daze.. that somehow some way i will awake. thinking that i should do something, become something.
and He keeps telling me to rest in Him.
to hide in Him.
i can't believe it's been six months ago tonight.
i miss you.. you big butthead.

7 comments:

Nicole said...

so glad you are blogging again!!!! does not seem like 6 mos...

still sucks.

love you

Anonymous said...

He really was a special butthead wasn't he. I never knew I loved him so much until he was gone. I love you, you really are the best. Thank's for being so real.

Tina said...

praying for you mel.... I know that you are hurting. You hold up well for the world... but inside...

love you.

Michelle said...

it's harder now than then, i think... reality is beginning to set in... i miss our great butthead so much... wish i could take away your pain... love you more than can be expressed in words - he knew that too - that you loved him even without words...

Michelle Gibilisco said...

Oh Mel! Look how cute you were! Hang in their sweetie, sometimes it takes awhile to make sense of it all. Hope to see you at Easter!

Heth said...

I love you Mel.

Amie said...

Rough year. Do you ever wonder what he's doing right now? Can they see us? Too bad you can't wake up out of a dream like that - it's really real and it's really hard. And real. And hard. Where was he buried?